My dear Amma,
Last night my dear one and I quarrelled and I went to bed unhappy and desolate.
Soon after, my son messaged to ask why I was distancing myself from 'everybody'. I did'nt reply to that, leaving it for today.
This morning started off on a bad note. The quarrel with my love continues to Part II. And I've been thinking of what to say to my son. All in all, neither of them is happy. Both feel I have let them down.
I feel helpless, Amma. My mind feels sad; it is telling me that I am incapable of handling people, even those whom I love; that I only make them dissatisfied and unhappy.
Amma, please be with them. Look after them; let them be alright. And tell me what to do.
I remember writing to you a few days ago Amma, telling you I've understood that every 'problem' is really a blessing in disguise. It is up to me to accept the gift.
Remembering that is giving me a surge of hope and the feeling that you are really sending me something wonderful today. I will not reject or shy away from these 'problems' therefore, Amma, but accept them wholeheartedly. Let me be open to them Amma, and the gifts they carry within, whether lessons for me or something else.
Be with me please, Amma, every moment of today. I need you so much.
With all my love,
Your loving daughter,
Vidya
No comments:
Post a Comment